“I don't understand, sir. What do those people have to do with war?”
“You've been living your life in a city that has not seen a battle for almost three hundred years. We have expanded this kingdom far beyond its original borders. It is the people at the borders who pay the price for our power and wealth.
“When I was your age I discovered life outside the castle, and with it, opportunities to put some of my training to the test. I got into terrific fights with gangs of orphans the first few times I went out. Disguised, naturally, and in all secrecy so no one could stop me.” At the last sentence, a bit of the gravity left his voice and Catherine smiled at the thought of the little boy sneaking out. It was nice to remember that he had been young.
“My training continued and I decided to pursue a further career in the military. That is encouraged either way. Of course, nobody knew how often I snook out at night and had some fun on my own.” His voice had gotten even lighter and Catherine could hear a smile. “I imagined that life would continue that way. I did not see anything dishonourable in eventually killing other men who felt as I did. I thought all soldiers were men who simply enjoyed fighting for what ever reason they found important. I imagined battle to be the ultimate test to my abilities, and nothing more.
“When I went to the border to fight in the area around a state we had recently invaded, I was still full of these dreams. Then we reached the front. It was a sad place, trodden into muddy fields by the many boots, kept up by old men and women who were unable to stand the cold. I heard my brothers scream as their limbs were amputated. That was when I realised that it is not always a fight to the death.
“As we rode onwards into the lands we had invaded, it was the sight of sick, hungry children running barefoot in the snow that finally cured me of my hunger for honour. Young women sold their bodies to provide for their babies and siblings. Older women starved.
“We stayed in the area for many months, fighting off and killing frightened young men who had no other choice than to place themselves in front of their lands. By then I had long since abandoned my honour and went along with the madness. As peace slowly came, as we slowly killed everyone who fought us, I began to feel better about the entire thing. After all, the people who were left were now a part of our glorious kingdom and would surely live to thank us.
“I stayed with a few of my men in the house of a small family. The mother was only a few years older than me, and took care of her three children alone. Her husband had been killed before the last one had been born. She did not like us, but our money kept her from being openly hostile. We left, moving onwards to secure a few smaller areas. When we came back a year later, I wanted to see if they were still healthy. The little children had somehow left an impression. Or maybe their mother's silent dignity had touched me. I cannot tell you.
“The house had been torn to pieces. The children were living in filth, begging for gerbage from their former neighbours. The mother had been put into prison by our army for stealing grains that were meant to be taken back to this very city as taxes.”
The prince grew quiet. Catherine could not take her eyes off his dirty face. He looked haunted by the memory, and she could understand why he would feel that way. The story he had just told her was horrible, something that she would never forget. She suddenly remembered many of her father's stories in a new light. Large parts of his entire trade depended on such cruelty. She started when the prince spoke again.
“They took her to the beach one early fall morning. It was a beautiful day. The sun was so white, the sky was bright. A little wind, just enough for the seagulls to ride on, created perfect waves. She recognised me. I could tell that she had been crying so much that she could not do it anymore. She begged me to help her children, swore that she would spend her entire afterlife taking care of me if I would only do something for them. I promised her to take them with me.
“She looked so peaceful after that. Her body was destroyed by hunger and torture, but her face lit up, and she started singing an autumn hymn. She did not stop before they had let her into the icy water and pushed her head under the waves.”
Catherine had been holding her breath. Theft was often punished by death, but she had never heard of a crime so small and so understandable being punished so harshly. When the prince finished his story she found herself crying like a baby. No matter how embarrassed she was to let him see her tears, she could not help herself.
Sobs shook her entire body. She could sense him tensing up next to her, but he did not shout. After a few moments she felt his hand on her shoulder.
“Catherine, I apologise. I do not know why I told you that. It is unforgivable of me to have upset you so.”
She shook her head, but she could not see if he saw it. A handkerchief was pushed into her open hand, and she gratefully wiped her face with it.
“Don't be sorry,” she said, tears still rolling down her cheeks. “I just didn't expect it to be so horrible. I never thought about any of this.”
The prince shrugged and looked away. It seemed to be more out of respect than anger, which warmed her heart towards him yet a little more.
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